5 hours and no chair

for those of you unfamiliar with the search for the perfect beach chair it started 5 hours ago and i never found it. what in gods name is wrong? and i don’t know if its the store i think is at fault for not carrying such an item at the height of the season OR me for being such a picky bitch. why was this so important to me? why would i search high and low for such a ridiculous item? i think the feeling that i’m not truly accomplishing anything each day leads me to approach these silly tasks i set out to do with UBER importance and fervor; its like im semi crazed. i said semi.

now, what was planning on doing in this chair? this very important-must have right now chair. anyone know? besides spy on my neighbors? drink, thats a definite. read, i love reading outside for some reason. get that medium tan, sunkissed look because i honestly believe it makes me look thinner. sick i know. facebook, that’s another given. and lets just mention drink again people. never did it cross my mind to actually job search while in the chair and enjoying the summer weather. i wanted to say SEE ME COMPANY WHO LET ME GO, I HAVE A TAN AND I SIT IN THE SUN WITH NO WORRIES IN THE WORLD. i think its a little FUCK YOU to them. what in gods name is wrong with me?

funny thing is I’ve actually done this before. something very similar. while in a horrible dead end job i hated years ago i was given the warning IF YOU ARE LATE ONE MORE TIME YOU WILL BE SUBJECT TO 2 DAYS UNPAID, A PENALTY FOR BEING SO CARELESS AND IRRESPONSIBLE. so when i showed up late weeks and weeks later i thought maybe he forgot. he didn’t. he called me into his office and said i would have FRIDAY AND SATURDAY UNPAID. DO NOT COME TO WORK. I thought to myself did he just give me a long weekend? how is this a penalty? i went for a spray tan both days so i could return to work monday with a fuck you smile and make him (hopefully) sick to his stomach. SEE, I DONT CARE ABOUT YOUR STUPID RULES. I AM SO CAREFREE I WAS BASKING IN THE SUN & YOU THOUGHT IT WAS PUNISHMENT.

there really is something seriously wrong with me. i was 29 then im 33 now. we cant blame this on youth.